oa oa oa.. buồn quá đi mất. hôm nay mình lại khóc ầm ĩ trên mặt đàn.
trước đó thì mình đã đàn cho Tiến nghe, cheer him up. Tiến đang ở phòng trọ, và buồn khổ.
hôm qua thì mình đàn cho Hoàng nghe, cheer him up, Hoàng mới ra việc, và đang ở Huế, chán nản.
hôm trước nữa thì mình đàn cho Cigar nghe, cheer him up. Cigar đang ngồi ở trạm xăng, nothing to do.
trước đó nữa? mình đàn cho anh Sơn nghe. đó là lần đầu tiên từ trước đến nay anh Sơn nghe mình đàn.
Tiến nghe xong, trả lời: cảm ơn sư phụ. Hoàng nghe xong, hỏi rằng : tớ đang nghe nhạc từ Window Media đấy ư? anh Sơn nghe xong, nói rằng : em làm anh nhớ tới một ông Tây nọ anh hay gặp, ổng hay chơi đàn một mình.
mọi người nghe xong, đại khái ra về hoan hỉ. cúp điện thoại. còn mình ngòi lại. tự đàn tự nghe tự an ủi tự khóc.
không hiểu sao mình lại thành một cái trụ cột thế này.. oa oa.. mình ko muốn làm trụ cột gì hết mà.
mình ko hiểu sao nữa.
đại khái là mình buồn. thế thì làm thế nào? mình vào internet. mình vào email của mình. mình gửi một email toàn những lời động viên hoành tráng và cảm động đến địa chỉ của...mình. rồi mình vào check mail, và làm như là ai đó vừa mới gửi. mình có thể tìm thấy cái mail đó cả trong inbox và trong sent mail. anyway, chẳng sao cả. thế thì mình có thể đọc nó nhiều hơn. khi mình buồn hơn nữa, mình tự gửi ecard cho mình. khi mình thấy lạnh lẽo, mình lấy cái điện thoại này gọi vào điện thoại kia. mình tự xoay sở dc mà.
nhưng thỉnh thoảng cũng thấy yếu đuối thế nào ấy.
thế là mình đã viết cái này, và tag bà con trên facebook. mọi người có vẻ vui. và mình cũng vậy. viết nó ra, mình thấy mình quả là một người may mắn.
A Thousands Thanks and Kisses (if you don’t mind) to You,
All of You.
Oh la la…
Last night I dreamed a dream in which I almost got killed in a horrible trap set by a huge lion. I run, I fought, and I cried for help. It was very dreadful. Yet very quickly I was rescued by a strong-brave-and-sparkling dragon (he he he). When I woke up this morning, I thought of how many times in life I have fallen over and how You All have always helped . So I thought and so I came to this declaration: right now I must express my gratefulness to all of you for coming to my life. All of you have been “angels of kindness” to me. Hí hí hí.. Thank You!
So many a time I was broke, Thao Wan always lent me some money. She also offered me lots of beautiful blank papers (for me to write notes). Kiss you, Wan!
And when I unintentionally complained that I did not want to be alone, My Ngan spent half of her day sitting next to me. I had my books with me, but she had none. Anyway she sat, silently and patiently. So did Thao Nguyen. She has been even more patient with me than my mother. Thao Nguyen is really a big sister of all 07G-ers. Thank you, Ngan and Nguyen!
When I was sick and quit some Linguistic classes, Trieu, the brightest student of the faculty, generously gave me his paper with all the answers filled. It was to help me re-checking my answer-sheet before I tremblingly went on stage and performed with phonetic transcript exercises, on which Ms To Minh Thanh had strictly demanded. When I felt a bit dizzy and fainted on the 3rd floor, Trieu shouted so loudly that other people from the 4th floor could even hear: THẢO XÍU BỊ XỈU! THẢO XÍU BỊ XỈU ..
Thank you, Dinh Phuong, you have always helped me with our Spanish tests. Many people have come to America, and they have stayed. But I do hope to see Phuong again. You won’t stay there for good, will you ?
Kelvin, my only Chinese friend. You brightened my days when you were there, thank you, K. Though I cannot recall a single Chinese word now, I remembered well the way you taught me. It was so lively, K… K can play 8 kinds of musical instruments.
Cigar can only play the guitar, but he does it too beautifully! Cigar has always been on my side. 6 years ago, he helped defend me from Kefka’s “verbal attacks”. Two days ago, he sent messages to all people he’s known, saying that “Thao played me a song today!”. What I could do with the keyboard is but a one-tenth part to what you can do with your guitar. Anyway, you praised me, and this made me so happy for the whole day, you know!
When I fainted, 07G helped me in every way possible! Someone offered me candies. Someone made me a bottle of hot tea. Someone complained that my hands were too cold and my face was too pale. Someone brought me downstairs. Someone took me to the school-bus. Nhung accompanied me all the way, talking non-stop to make sure that I was awake. Can Tho sat with me, listening to my nonsense words. Ha Vy took a taxi with me. Khoi Nguyen rode his motorbike along with the taxi, making sure everything was okay.
NO-EVIL-ers were also the best friends of mine on this earth. Linh let me use her cell phone to make lots of messages to Mr.S. Tam let me read her fictions and gave me carefully-wrapped presents. Loan always encouraged me in any way possible, reminding me that we needed to listen to our head just as much as our heart.. Quyen told jokes that no one could resist to laugh. Though at the moment we’re in different continents (sounds big, huh ? hehe), there would definitely be a day when we can together sing our traditional song “Those Were The Days”. (for Quyen, will we sing Ob La Di, Ob La Da once again, dear ? heheh). Honestly, I hate the school named Le Hong Phong and everything related to it, at the very CORE of myself. But I must exclude NO-EVIL-ers from this. You were great (and so was DBSK!! :D)!
There was a time I did not wear any smiles on my face, even very fake ones. Phat Thuy Mong helped me through this time. We sat, and talked, for hours. To be more specific, we talked behind other people’s backs. Monstrously, we found it SO SO SO MUCH interesting! Hehehe. Our conversations were nonsensical, completely nonsensical. But it was him that made me feel like living. He lightened my hopes, my very hopes towards the unseen future! Hehhehe…Thank you, Phat. You are awesome in my eyes, and certainly in lots of other people’s too!
Ah! Xuan Anh, I love you, even though you must have loved your Quoc Bao only…
For Tam, my student, thank you for all the phonecalls and encouragements that you have made. You have always listened to me, which surprised me a lot. I am grateful to your respect. And I promise to be your good master, Tam!
When I was alone and about to cry, Duy came and called out my name, clearly and loudly: Thanh Thao. I almost burst into tears at that moment, for I did not expect such a thing to happen. It’s been 12 years since the last time we met but he still could recall my name! When we were 6 years old, Duy was my classmate. Now we’re 19, he is suddenly my angel.
Viet Huy is another angel of mine. It was 3am and I was sitting in darkness, waiting my papers to be attached in emails. I was bitten cruelly by mosquitos, and I was very much sleepy. So, he stayed, sending me jokes through Yahoo!, keeping me awake. VietHuy’s always been my very sweet friend for 14 years.
It would be a mistake if I do not mention my beloved fabulous-industrious-creative-amazingly attractive group entitled “On a Whim We Wanna Present” (tam dich : Bong Dung Muon Thuyet Trinh`). We did great, which cannot be denied in any sense!! Hong An, the custome supervisor, was so fashionable and sensitive. Thank you for all of your encouraging words for me, An! Thanh Giang was the “source of entertainment” for our whole group (and class as well). She is mysteriously funny, indeed!!
Thank you, Thuy! You have changed your walking habit (you walk quickly, looking straight forward) to fit mine(I walk slowly, in a walk a bit – run a bit – sometimes sit a a bit manner, looking around and watching clouds while walking). You went shopping with me. You downloaded classiclal movies for me. You ate out with me. You have never upseted me. You have never needed my apologies when I was wrong to you, you have always said “I know you have your reasons.” …. How great you are!
What about Soi and Khi ? they are outstandingly nice! Soi talked to me on a topic that no one at the age of 20 would like to talk (hehe, right, dear?). Khi confided in me almost all her secrets. You two somehow have made me feel so proud!! Kiss youo! Hehhe..
For Ba` Huynh, Ba Dang, Kim Thy, Milo and Thu, I am so grateful to what you did for me when we were in the military training course. Kim Thy woke me up every morning at 5am. Milo went brushing teeth with me. Thu had breakfasts with me (which was usually instant-noodles). Ba Dang brushed my hair every evening. Khi volunteered to lie outside, for she feared I would fall over to the floor later. We had a good time. We were not in a top quality hotel at all, but you were there and so I was happy to be there too! If you all had not been there, I wonder if I could survive a single day there. We had to get up at 5:30, go to bed at 10:00, no internet, no coffee, no eating out, no shower cream, no delicious meals. Like you, i had very little things there. But luckily, I had you. Thank you!!! Thank you!!!!
Ca Mat Ngu, she was so worried about me that her Yahoo status once was the line “ Bộp Tồ, nếu 10h tối nay mà cô chưa chịu sign out mà đi ngủ thì cô biết tôi!”.. I was touched, indeed. I was touched!
Ah! Luon Chan, you have listened to me whining for 6 years or so… Poor you, dear. But you can never know how much I have appreciated your “enduring”. You are my best listener I can have in this world, Luon Chan! Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. Although we have never met, I strongly believe that you’re very much handsome, for your soul is beautiful...
Chi Thanh, Chi Nguyen and Anh Luan are also the very ones that helped me generously this year. What I did to them was but a grain of sand (participating as a contact person in VIK 2009), but what they did to me was a huge moutain (taking me immidiately to hospital, taking care of me, paying fees for me, accompanying me home at midnight). Working with you Is one of the most precious experiences I’ve ever had so far. Thanks a lot!!
For Nhi Nhi, thank you for your patience with my questions on english irregular verbs. I don’t know why I am so lucky to have known you all! Isn’t it a blessing ?
Your lives must have been full of ups and downs. So has been mine. Anyway, as a little-but-fierce creature that was born on so lucky a day (9/9/1989), I have got you, my dear friends. You all have been my knights, rescuing me from times of hardship. And so, thank you!!! i love you, all.